IN MEMORY OF A GOOD FRIEND

 "Although it's difficult today to see beyond the sorrow, 

 may looking back in memory help comfort you tomorrow." 

  - Unknown

CHAN HON FONG

Departed 16/03/2011

A man of few words..... and a thousand words!

I couldn't think of any words more apt to describe Chan than the above which, to me, are reflective of someone who is knowledgeable yet humble. 

When I first met Chan more than 20 years ago during one of the MNS trip, he came across as the strong, silent type.  A man with a serious demeanor when he was not smiling or animatedly talking, he was not somebody that you would approach in the first instance.  But after our first few trekking trips together, although he still wasn’t much of a talker, he showed himself to be a responsible, helpful guy and once we got to know him better, he became the person for whom our respect was without reservation.  When part of a group, he would start off more as an observer rather than participant, until he was asked for his opinion on the topic in hand.  But once he got started, there would be no stopping him!  :D 

In other words, he was not the type who would dominate a conversation to show his know-all, unless he was pulled in.  But it doesn’t matter to the rest of us because whatever was the topic of discussion, he was able to offer an opinion and to back them up with facts and stats, and all we could do was take our hats off to him for his vast knowledge.   A man full of interest to know what makes the whole world ticks, he liked to keep himself updated by reading up on all sorts of materials, be in the sciences, politics, DIY, health and whats-not.  Like our other dear belated friend, Heah, Chan was also a very good cook and a capable DIY person. 

Lending a helping hand

He was a loyal friend, always reliable whenever help was needed so whenever we go on a particularly tough or unknown trek, our confidence would doubled should he came along.  One of the fittest guys among us, Chan was always obliging and carrying more than his fair share of the communal load.  During a few of our trips, when somebody got into trouble and needed help, he would always be one of those who would stay behind to lend the helping hand. 

A kind, humble man who was always respectful of the elder and a true blue family man who took good care of his family and made sure that he was home every day after work to cook dinner for them, it left an ache in the heart of his loved ones and all his friends that God should decide to have him by His side so soon.  Maybe God has other plans for him, and one of them was for him to serve as a reminder to the rest of us to not take for granted what are around us but to take a step back now and then to appreciate those around us and to take care of ourselves, if not for ourselves, then for our loved ones.

In his trademark trekking outfit

To his wife, our dear friend Kwee Eng, be comforted that Chan was much-loved and respected by all those whose life he touched, not just his siblings for whom he was the pillar, but also his close MNS friends and he will be dearly missed.  And we hope, over time, his sons will emulate all the good qualities that their father stood for.

20 March 2011

NEW YEAR AT CAMERON HIGHLANDS

The decision to break more than a decade's tradition of watching fireworks in KL on New Year's Eve by spending this year's eve with friends at the MNS Research Centre in Boh Plantation, Cameron Highlands, was well worth it when my daughter and I managed to 'capture' the following beauties with our cameras to feast our eyes, in addition to the wonderful company, great weather and plentiful of food!  HAPPY NEW YEAR! :-)

January 2011

A BRIGHT NEW MORN....

I couldn't resist putting here the pictures I took of these beautiful new seedlings, signifying a bright new morning and the beginning of a new life, which we came across along the trail during this weekend's camping trip.



11-Sept-2010

MY DEAREST MUM

Dearest Lou Ma Ji, two years may have gone by since you left us but your cheerfulness, constant laughter and sense of humour are never far from our hearts.

Mum was one of the most cheerful octogenarian anybody had ever met and every time I looked at her pictures showing her many expressions of cheerfulness, a sense of warmth still fills my heart...

To my dearest mum, you will always be remembered.

 4 August 2010

THE PERFECT PRESENT FROM MY 'IMPERFECT' DAUGHTER

"I am not a perfect mother and I will never be.

You are not a perfect daughter and you will never be.

But put us together and we will be the best mother and daughter we would ever be."

~ Unknown ~

To my perfect ‘imperfect’ daughter, mummy does not want a perfect daughter as life would be so boring if you do not …

… make me mad

… make me glad

… make me snappy
… make me happy

… make me frown

… make me smile

… make me upset

… make me proud

… make me fret

… make me laugh
… make me anxious

… make me joyous

… make me worry

… make me zippy

… make me sad

and most of all … do not give me reason to NAG! ;p

MUMMY LOVE YOU, TOO!  :D

Daughter do you know

I wonder can you see

How precious is your life

and all you mean to me

You fill my days with light

You make me laugh out loud

You, I am so glad to have

Of you, I am so proud

May 2010 

OF CHINA TOILETS AND SPITTING CHINAMEN....

                                                                                                                                                                                                                        
OF CHINA TOILETS……

One of the more decent door-less toilets.  Others are just too disgusting to show. 
All nicely tiled up but why no door la?

The toilet situation in Chengdu (and I believe in many cities in China) is a paradox in the outskirts of the city. I went to China filled with many ‘horrified’ stories about China’s door-less toilets in many tourists areas outside of the city or toilets with open drains where ladies squat in a row so I actually went armed with my trusty old umbrella, in case I should need to do some covering up! So it was with great surprise that when I visited the first tourist site about 40 km out of the city on my second day in Chengdu, I found the toilets were spick and span, and with infra-red sensors that actually worked, unlike many of those in Malaysia!

However, a short distance away from the tourist site where we stopped for lunch, I discovered that, true enough, the toilets were without doors, with no flush whatsoever, and stank to hell!  And this happened throughout the span of our visits to various other tourist sites – one minute you have first-class toilets and at the next stop, it was back to basics again. It was only much later that it struck me! Most of the places where the toilets were with doors and modern infra-red flushes were those sites that were designated World Heritage Sites by UNESCO! But once outside of this boundary, it was back to ‘open-plan’! hehehe :p. We were lucky because my daughter and I had each other to stand guard over the other, making sure others don’t come near enough to get a view, while holding our breath!

But what I couldn’t understand was that even with toilets where there were doors many of the ladies choose not to close them! So you strode in, thinking there was nobody and then smack in your face, will be this lady squatting right in there in full view for you to see! Choy!!  So after 2 or 3 times of such misadventure, I learnt the art of walking pass these toilet cubicles and, with the corner of my eye, sensed whether there was any ‘image’ or movement and if so, to walk straight through to the next one and so on. ;-)

After a while, it became a game between my girl and me when we needed to make a toilet stop to guess whether it was going to be door-less or otherwise!

The interesting thing was, many of these door-less toilets were nicely built, all tiled up so why did the authorities decide to save on the door?

... AND SPITTING CHINAMEN!

Another situation which I just can’t get over with in China was the 'forever-spitting' Chinamen!  And they spat just about anywhere, anytime - while they were walking, cycling, driving and even in the bus!  Yucks!!  Where in the world do they find all the sputum in their system?  For the fun of it, my girl and I tried to work out some from our throats and guts but it was in vain!  Hahaha! What was especially disgusting was when you were walking through this beautiful World Heritage designated site or forest, enjoying the scenery (and you could tell the place were constantly swept to keep the place clean as there was hardly any fly-away leaves or rubbish) and then right in front of you, there will be this man that went ‘krrrrrkk… puiitt’! And splat!, the sputum landed just in front of you, missing you by inches!

After sometime, I tried to avoid walking behind any Chinamen and it soon became a habit that I kept looking down to avoid stepping on any of this disgusting stuff.  :-(

One of the many beautiful scenes in the tourist sites around
Sichuan Province.  This one is taken in Leshan City, where the
biggest carved stone Buddha in the world resides and
is a designated World Heritage site by UNESCO.
Toilets here were excellent. :-)

November 2009

WHO FEELS THE PAIN?

“If you have never been hated by your child you have never been a parent."
~Bette Davis

In the course of my work at a private university college, I had on many occasions came across cases of teenage-parent conflict, most often because these teenagers felt their parents were being too strict with them and they therefore either turn even more rebellious or refused to communicate with their parents.

As such, when I came across an article in an online media in support of Tok Guru Nik Aziz’s recent outburst and call for action to settle PAS' internal problems, using caning by parent as an example, I couldn’t resist reproducing it here as it was so reflective of one of the main problems plaguing children-parent relationships. It is not only about caning but also other forms of punishments that parents may impose on their child for any wrongdoings or over-indulgences. Unfortunately, I am unable to credit the author as he did not put down his name. I hope if he happens to come across this, he will not mind that I’ve used part of his article here, but happy that it did at least strike a chord, albeit for a different reason.  I have only extracted relevant parts of his article and made minor changes.


“Who feels the most pain when a parent is forced to cane their own child? The parent? Or the child?

As a parent ourselves, we know pretty well that each stroke of rotan that strikes our child feels like a knife cutting through our heart - just like the saying, ‘Hit on your flesh, pain in my heart.’ Unfortunately, most of the time, we have to accept the fact that our children will not able to understand that the physical pain that they have to endure is way less than the emotional pain we have to suffer for caning them.

But, as a parent, we have to stay strong and do the right thing for our children even though it is painful for us to do so. Punishing or scolding our own child is always for the better good with a hope that our children will learn from their mistakes and excel in their life even when we are no longer around.

We certainly wish that our children will understand our pains and sacrifices later in life; but we really wouldn't mind if they don't, as long as they are on the right path to have an excellent life in the future.

We, as parents, prefer ourselves to be the person punishing our own children rather than seeing our children being punished by others in the society. "

To all the teenagers out there, I hope they will be able to read this and understand ….

"Don't handicap your children by making their lives easy."

~Robert A. Heinlein

30-Oct-2009